It's not funny

So, our Saturday night pre-dinner lime-based drink was starting to take effect when there was a kind of splatty noise near our occasional table (two stacked upside down coca-cola crates).  The wife, who has already been having a bad day as squeezing the limes was extremely painful, hampered due to recently open (unintentional [so she says] self-inflicted) burn-based wound, bravely rattles the crates.  First pass yields nothing. A second, more aggressive thwack produced a further splat. Batty doesn't look too well.  How were we to know their sonar is not capable of detecting a simple ceiling fan.  Now, don't go all green, tree-hugger, save the snail on me, I know bats are protected in the UK but here they eat 'em and tonight is curry night - just need a few more. "Turn the fan up another notch darling, I've got the net ready..."